gym class.

was never a good time for me.

i went out last night and there were literally 2 dozen people whom i have not seen since 8th grade... about 9 years now. They stared and pointed but they didn't come up and talk to me... WHY? because in 8th grade i was "werid" i wasn't actually werid i was an orignal, i wore what i liked, i said what i wanted. The turning point in 8th grade that made me choose a vocational school was when i had a family issue and it traveled through the school like mono. i was humiliated, and disrespected to the point in which i cried everyday. Not just because people said i should ill myself like the person i looked up to, but because i was told all my life that dancing to the beat of your own drum was key to happiness. WEEEELLLLLL actually the key to my happiness is moments in time that i laugh so hard i can't breath, moments like when you trip over nothing and you make a joke out of it and people think it's clever. Moments that you say something outragous and it catches on like the plauge.... i accidnetly said "Pie the way" and now it's a big thing amoung friends.

but last night i felt likea caged animal being teased and the glass between us was the only thing keeping them from my wrath. i wanted to punch a few of the people in the faces, not because of 8th grade crap. But that exact moment i was walkingto the bathroom to wash my hands because i accidently touch some gum that was not mine, someone thought it would be funny to TRIP ME. really? seriously? you're fucking 22/23 and you treat me like 8th grade all over again. they are lucky i was called for karaoke.... (paramore misery business) But they had the nerve to boo me. who does that when half the place is clapping and the people that "know you" are booing?.

this past few months have been stupid and pointless...

i am now planning my son's 3rd birthday party and he wants a bug theme.... right up my alley!